the loss of a loved one

Late on Tuesday night, January 20th, B lost his Dad to an undiagnosed illness and a recurring heart problem. I do not know Uncle or his other family that well. What I do know, I've learnt mostly from B and that's not much. B's Dad and Mum split up when he was still in his teens but B continued to maintain a close relationship with his Dad. Over the years, I've seen his Dad age with a heart problem but without complaints. Whenever we visited, he always enquired, "How is Mother ?" and "How is D ?". Yesterday, as I sat at Uncle's wake, it saddened me that D (B's younger brother who's estranged from his father) never made any effort to attend. He earlier sent B a text message saying how remorseful he felt. Somehow I feel that remorse was not something he felt in his heart. It may have easily been a word he looked up in the dictionary. Today at the funeral, there was also no sign of D. So what's the point of feeling remorseful if one does not bother to act on such a feeling when an opportunity exist ? How easily a person forgets ! Somehow, with Uncle's death, B has managed to forge a relationship with his half brother, K. His extended family treated him really well. They were a family consisting of Auntie (Uncle's second wife), three sons and the youngest, a daughter, P. Oh yes, and BiBi the Shih Tzu.

Auntie is a warm and hardworking lady. When we were much younger, she used to wait on tables in the day and wash dishes to supplement the family income in the night. She progressed to work as a seamstress in a garment factory. She recently has to stop working when Uncle became ill. Her children may not all be well educated but as a mother, she succeeded in bringing up four respectful and well-mannered children. That's her success story; a success that she shared with Uncle and it was evident in the way they accepted B.

K is a funny, cute, humble and respectful guy with a cheerful and caring disposition. We call him "Mr. Why" for the many questions that he keeps asking. K and B seemed to get along exceptionally well and I am happy for them as B knows his Dad is. It was always Uncle's wish that both his families meet and bond with each other and with the exception of D, it was a wish fullfilled. It's somewhat sad that Uncle never witnessed this but I know that he knows and is watching his family from a better place and with a smile. I hope and pray that B finds it in himself to "look the other way" when irritatability hits.

P is the baby and princess in the family. She's getting married on February 6th and it's really sad that Uncle won't be there in person to celebrate this joyous occassion. I'm sure he'll be watching over them and savouring every moment as well as those who are there in person.

I can't say anything about both the other sons. I never had the chance to meet or speak with them so I'll let them remain a mystery for now.

And to Uncle, may your soul rest in eternal peace and may perpetual light shine upon you always. Your work is done and it is now time for you to have a well-deserved rest. You're in a better place, safe from ills and pain.